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posted on 7/11/20

A Chicago woman just realized that it is time to move on from her marriage. The stress of Illinois’ stay-at-home orders has helped her realize that her husband is verbally abusive to her and her children. She is tired of him coming home drunk and screaming at her and her adolescent children. She has decided that getting a divorce could be the only good thing to come out of the last few difficult months.

While she is confident in her decision, she is still worried about how to tell her children that their parents’ marriage is over. If you have decided that it is time to seek a divorce, here are a few ideas for helping yourself and your children prepare for the transition in the family.

Remind Your Children That They are Not at Fault

It is human nature to blame ourselves for situations that are out of our control. No matter how old your children are, they might feel that they are at fault for your divorce. Reassure your children as many times as you need to that the divorce is not their fault and that there is nothing they can do to change the situation. Remind your children that you and your spouse are making some changes, but your children are not the ones to be blamed.

Remind Your Children That Their Parents Will Always be There for Them

It is important that your children understand that their parents may be separating and living in different houses, but they will always be there for them. Remind your children that no matter what changes happen over the next few weeks or months, that you and your ex will always be there to support them.

Tell Your Children Together, if Possible

It is not always possible for both parents to talk to their children about the divorce at the same time. However, if it is possible, doing so can be incredibly helpful. If you and your spouse are on decent speaking terms, sit down together and decide on what message you would like to convey to your children. That way, you will be on the same page and present a united front, which will ultimately benefit everyone. Be calm and confident when you speak to your children and respond as compassionately as you can.

Try to Understand the Needs of Your Children

The stress of going through divorce is mentally and emotionally exhausting. When you go through the process, be sure to picture each of your children as individuals. Ask yourself what they need based on their personalities and ages. Nobody knows your children better than you do, but it can be easy to neglect their emotional needs during an incredibly stressful time. Find the most comforting words possible for each child and constantly remind them how much you love them.

Contact an Experienced Divorce Lawyer as Soon as Possible

One of the most important steps to take in your divorce is to contact a Cook County divorce lawyer. Even if you only recently decided to start the divorce process, a divorce lawyer can offer invaluable advice. Contact Glasgow & Olsson as soon as possible to schedule your initial consultation.